I know, it has been so long. It has been a long time for many things in my life, sin and debauchery not withstanding, although I have managed to save some purity hidden deep somewhere within my cold, cold heart.
I went on a road trip this weekend.
Some things I learned in Atlantic City
Opening a beer bottle with your teeth, will usually score you a free one. People will stare at you in awe and wonderment. It is not advised to try this at home although it is advisable in a strip club that is BYOB, in which you have not.
Do not wear a cheerleader's skirt to a casino.
Do not wear a cheerleader's skirt to a strip club.
Do not heed fashion advice from men without any sense or interest in fashion, they will always opt for the cheerleader's skirt.
If you insist on ignoring the previous advice, do so with a large man. He may be mistaken for your pimp, but hey, what the fuck you wearing a cheerleading skirt to dens of debauchery for anyway, you fuckwad?
If you still insist on wearing trucker hats, make a roadtrip to southern Jersey, you will find boxes of them, all cooler then yours for twenty-five cents apiece.


Posted 2:05 AM by J.Ro